“I don’t know about you, folks. When I was growing up, I never expected to be able to afford everything I wanted. There are certain things I couldn’t afford. I didn’t run around blasting those companies or those things. I just decided I was gonna have to, if I really wanted it, find a way to pay for it. But that doesn’t seem to be the attitude today.”
“Why isn’t the big news today, the Ohio State University attack, the fact that a white cop shot and killed a young black man who was only armed with a knife, why is that not big news?”
“Net neutrality is a big deal to the left because it puts the government in charge of the internet. It puts the government in charge of content. It lets the government choose what you can watch and what you can’t watch and what you pay for it. And that’s bogus. In the name of competition, they want to take competition away from the net.”
“If Trump is gonna go and recruit people for his Regime who have dissed him, why not go out and get Alicia Machado? You know, steal her from the Hillary camp.”
“Michigan’s been certified. Trump’s at 306 electoral votes. There’s nothing this pathetic Jill Stein can do.”
“Aren’t the same people who are claiming that the Russians hacked our elections and stole the election for Trump, the very same people who said that the Russians would never be able to hack Hillary’s unprotected, secret email server?”
“Let me tell you something straight up. I never talk about things that don’t matter. I never talk about things that are unimportant. I always talk about things that interest me.”
“It’s fun to watch the left go through their conniptions because they’re predictable. And when they happen there’s a glow of accuracy that envelopes me. And it’s fun to watch them go into conniptions. They’re going into conniptions over everything.”
“The net neutrality game is to make everybody the same so that there’s no difference and the prices are the same and if these Millennials got their way nothing would cost anything.”
“Who wants to stay in the net neutrality kind of business? That’s where cronyism develops. That’s where various telecoms would sidle up to the Regime in power for exceptions to existing rules in exchange for campaign donations or whatever. It’s exactly what we are getting rid of by sending the Obama Regime packing.”
“Hillary floating that she wants to keep the 2020 options open is simply a mechanism whereby she can go out and continue to ask dupes all over the world to keep sending money to the Clinton Foundation under the guise or the auspices that she may get elected someday and be able to pay back the donations. It’s just a continuation of the scam.”
“I’m the mayor of Realville. I’m Mr. Literal. And I never saw the benefit of complaining and whining and moaning. I don’t complain and whine and moan anyway, and I don’t deal well with people that do.”
“When you’re looking at the Clintons and trying to figure out why they do what they do you have to first zero in on the money. They have made that abundantly clear.”
“One of the first things that the Republican Congress is expected to do now is to defund Planned Parenthood. It is high on the agenda list and it looks like that’ll happen. And that’s gonna be an earthquake, and there’s gonna be a tsunami. And whatever it is that they are exercised about now, they will forget. I’m talking about the establishment, the left, the Democrats, they are going to go bonkers when that happens.”
“I’ve often said that this program is a combination of two things that you don’t see anywhere else. One is the serious, honest, in-depth discussion of ideas combined with off-the-wall, irreverent humor, satire, and parody, both sides with credibility.”
“The movement existed before Trump did, and the movement didn’t have a leader. People in the movement were hoping the Republican Party was going to be the vehicle, but the Republican Party wanted no part of it. They signed on with the rest of the Washington establishment. Trump came along and immediately tapped into a movement.”
“The techies want net neutrality — which is the FCC — making sure that nobody can offer something nobody else can offer. That’s neutral, that’s fair, and they call it completely competitive. It isn’t competitive. That’s anti-competitive when you set everybody up as the same price, offerings, quality, quantity, all of that. It’s absurd.”
“What we do here is expose the left. We deconstruct them and expose them. They are ruining this country, and they’re doing it under the guise of transforming it and ‘modernizing’ it and ridding it of the baggage of the founding. It’s horrible what they have been doing.”
“Net neutrality may not be front and center today, it’s going to be once Trump’s inaugurated and his FCC starts fixing the things Obama broke. Not just the FCC, but all throughout this administration.”
“The cord-cutting generation hates cable TV ’cause they think they’re corporations and they rip people off and they make you buy a bunch of channels you never watch in order to get the channels that you do watch. It’s turning out that buying all these things a la carte is gonna cost them much more than the old fashioned cable package was, and they’re devastated and disappointed, and they can’t believe it’s working out that way.”
“Look at the way liberals name things. ‘Net neutrality.’ It’s like Switzerland! They don’t take sides, everybody’s fair, everything’s the same.”
“By definition, liberals don’t believe in competition, and you know that. Competition is the root of all evil, as far as leftists are concerned, ’cause there are winners and there are losers, and the losers are sad and disappointed, and that’s unacceptable. So everything must be the same. Nobody can have more than anybody else.”
“Cable companies have to pay ESPN almost $6 per subscriber. That’s three times what they have to pay for HBO or anything else, and ESPN is losing gazillions of dollars with these cancellations. They are over 600,000 subscribers down now. Now, are they losing these people because people tired of cable TV? Are they losing ’cause they’re tired of ESPN becoming political? We don’t know yet.”
“I always run out of time. There’s never enough time to finish.”