“The media is so excited about the stabbing of the Muslim cabdriver in New York. They think they’ve got their new Oklahoma City here.”
“Snerdley asks, why does everybody — except me — who speaks the truth have to end up apologizing? Because the truth is politically incorrect. You know what a political gaffe is? When somebody says the truth.”
“Imagine being in the middle of a vacation with your wife and kids, eating shrimp, buying shrimp, eating fried food, playing golf, and you have to take a conference call on the economy? There’s nothing fair in life, folks! Not a single thing!”
“My brother’s book is the one to prepare you with knowledge to be able to answer any question from, you know, idiots, dorks, and nerds that you may run into.”
“Obama is in the office late; he doesn’t spend a lot of time in there. I don’t think it’s laziness — I think it is arrogance. I think Obama thinks of himself as above the job.”
“I say what I mean, I mean what I say, and I love hearing myself say it. It’s just like how George Brett once told me he loved hitting home runs… I can understand that.”
“It used to be the journalist would tell you, ‘Hi, I’m from ABC News and I’m out to screw.’ Now they just show up looking like you.”
“Chris Matthews, why in the world are you thinking about a guy sitting at a cafe in Cairo? The guy sitting at a cafe in Cairo is thinking about how to get out alive, he’s notthinking about how to get into Michigan State!”
“You gotta say one thing for Geraldo: forty years and that jaw line has remained intact. I mean, that makes me jealous.”
“Damn right, I play golf every day. Damn straight, Snerdley! What? Yeah, I live on the beach, so why would I go to the beach?”
