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“I wonder if liberals would think that McCain is qualified to be president if he had been a ‘community organizer’ at the Hanoi Hilton.”
“Remember back when the East German women were men and taking all kinds of steroids and had mustaches? And the Soviet hockey team was actually a bunch of army guys armed with pistols? Those were the good old days of the Olympics.”
“When you’re a community organizer in Chicago working for a corrupt voter registration unit called ACORN, this is what you do: You try to divert attention with emotional appeals and rants.”
“I knew a lot of other guys who were deejays, and some of them had low standards and didn’t care what the groupie looked like — they just wanted the feedback and the ego thrill. That was not me. I had much higher standards.”
“A little story from LiveScience.com: ‘People with voices deemed sexy and attractive tend to have greater body symmetry, upon close inspection.’ Who got to do the close inspection?”
“I know liberals. I know them. I know what they’re going to say before they say it, I know what they’re going to do before they do it, and I know how they’re going to explain their failures when their ideas don’t work.”
“I guarantee you, if I had Obama on here for a conversation, all that would happen is that people who listen to this program regularly would get mad at me for going soft and not trying to destroy the guy, because I’m a polite person.”
“Nasty, nasty choice of words to describe our friends the Saudis, Mark. Very nasty. I thought a little bit here about letting it go, but, you know, my decorum and my cultural instincts said we had to bleep that.”
“The government is now going to make sure that if you borrow money from a mortgage broker to buy a house, you have to be able to prove you can pay it back. This government is heartless, isn’t it? Just absolutely coldhearted, cruel SOBs!”
“The difference between me and others with a sexy voice is: Everybody knows I have a great face to go along with it.”