RUSH: Susan in Alamo, California. I have been wondering how long it was going to be before I heard from you.
CALLER: Well, Rush, it’s been very hard for me to bring myself to this point, and I can best summarize this in a poem. “Roses are red. Sometimes they’re white. I was wrong about governor Benedict Arnold Schwartzenkennedy, and you Rush, like Jack Bauer, were right.” He’s a big phony. He’s a liberal. I am a hundred thousand times more angry at Arnold than I ever was when I called up at you yelling and screaming. I owe you a big apology. I’m the first to admit when I’m wrong and I’m rarely wrong, but you can take it back in San Jose two years ago when you apologized to me before 3,000 adoring fans including myself that you were wrong and I was right about Arnold. You can take it back. Go ahead, Rush. You can gloat. Go ahead.
CALLER: Is that it? You knew all along?
RUSH: I knew all along. Yes, of course. But the point is we had 3,000 people out there who were in the middle of a good time. I wasn’t going to get caught up on one subject of whether I was right or wrong so it’s easier. Look, I’ve been a husband. It’s just much easier to say I was wrong and move on.
CALLER: But, Rush, don’t you admit that Arnold started out as the terminator? He was the terminator of high taxes and deficit spending?
RUSH: Yes. Something’s happened.
CALLER: And he turned into the kindergarten creep. You know why he’s a creep? Because he promised me in a meeting a couple months after he was elected governor — I was in a meeting with 200 people — I asked him directly to never raise taxes. He said he would not, and guess what? I feel like a cheap date. He used me, misled me, cast me aside, and he’s imposing this four to 6% tax — which I call a tax, they call it a fee — on doctors and hospitals. I called up his office and I said, “What are you guys doing? What is Arnold thinking of?” They said, “Well it’s cheaper to pay for the health care for illegal aliens than it is to not pay for them, and it will be passed on in a fee,” and I said, “This fee is a tax,” and this snotty little assistant said, “No, it’s a fee,” and I said, “It’s a tax, a four to 6% tax!”
RUSH: Now they’re calling it a “loan.”
CALLER: Now they’re calling it a loan?
RUSH: They’re calling it a loan, not a fee, they’re calling it a loan.
CALLER: Ohhhhh, excuse me and thank you for being so articulate about that. Uh-oh. I hope I didn’t insult you (Laughing.) calling you articulate and everything.
RUSH: I’m clean, too. Don’t leave that out.
CALLER: That’s right, yeah, clean and nice looking and everything. I’m sorry I insulted you on Valentine’s Day, Rush, but you have been so nice to me and everything, and I just feel awful for calling and screaming and yelling at you, because you’re like the Jack Bauer of politics.
RUSH: Well, there’s one thing I know, Susan, and that’s conservatives and liberals. I know liberals like every square inch of my glorious naked body, and I only have to hear one thing from a so-called conservative to realize that he’s not fully conservative; he’s got liberal tendencies, and I heard those things from Arnold.
CALLER: Mmm-hmm.
RUSH: But I tell you, at the time you and I were having our little argument about this, on the balance sheet he was far more conservative than not. I was just trying to issue you a warning.
RUSH: I feel like Jack Bauer. After 18-1/2 years, some people still disagree with me. It’s like CTU always thinks or the president thinks, Bauer’s off his rocker. Bauer never knows what he’s talking about. “We can’t trust Bauer,” and yet he’s never wrong.
CALLER: Right, but you know what? It’s made me feel so good for about three years to gloat that I’m smarter than you and that was a great feeling, and now I’m like humbly throwing myself at your mercy. I don’t even deserve the great Select Comfort Sleep Number Bed you gave my husband and I, which we’re having more fun than married couples are allowed to have — and my idea is you should get Arnold and Maria a Sleep Number Bed so that they will think more clearly. They will get a great night’s sleep, they’ll wake up thinking clearly, and they’ll turn conservative again. That’s my solution.
RUSH: The problem with the Sleep Number Bed as a gift to Arnold is that it exceeds the gift limit.
CALLER: Oh, it does?
RUSH: Yeah.
CALLER: Well, just give him the air part, and not the whole thing.
RUSH: They’ve got the air. They’ve both got the air.
CALLER: They’ve got hot air? (Cackling.)
RUSH: Did you know that she did the governor’s radio address last Saturday or something?
CALLER: I’m so mad, I’m not listening to them anymore!
RUSH: Some are thinking she’s laying the groundwork for her own run for governor down the road.
CALLER: Oh, my God, just like Hillary.
RUSH: She’s denying it. Everybody is denying it and so forth. Look, what I was going to say to you, what I was going to say to you Susan is —
CALLER: Yes?
RUSH: — when you and I were having the argument —
CALLER: Yeah?
RUSH: — Arnold was far more conservative than not, but something has happened. I can’t begin to speculate. I wouldn’t speculate. It’s Valentine’s Day. But something has happened. There’s been a huge transformation out there. I don’t know if it’s just the inertia of state politics out there in California, or what have you. It could be it’s a number of things, but clearly he was unable to resist the onslaught of liberal influence and pressure regardless from where it came. Susan, I gotta run because of the constraints of time here. Let me take a quick break. We’ll come back and get our last couple of phone calls in after this. No need to send the bed back! Keep it. I still love you. You recognize your place now, and that’s all good with me.