“Two of my favorite words: ‘Halliburton’ and ‘Dubai.’ Ha, ha! Folks, does it get any better than this? Halliburton is going to move their headquarters to Dubai!”
“What kind of megalomania does somebody have to have to build themselves up in a forthcoming press conference, have everybody speculate that they’re going to get in the ring, and then say, ‘Guess what, I’m not’? You could have done this with an e-mail, Chuck Hagel.”
“The American people are not stupid. The American people have made Fox the most-viewed cable news network. And these liberals are sitting there and they’re, you know, they’re sucking…. their air. Got to keep it clean.”
“There aren’t any moderate Democrats. There are leftists, there are neo-liberals, and there are socialists — and the distinctions between those three are too tiny to notice.”
“The other day Punkin actually pulled the covers off of me and started biting my big toes! I just yanked my foot away and said, ‘I’m not doing it, Punkin. There’s food in the bowl. Just go there.’ Then I hear this ‘meow’ that I just know is an obscenity directed at me.”
“What do you mean, you ‘don’t agree with me’? You can disagree all you like, but if you’re wrong, you’re wrong — and you’re wrong. In fact, you’re wrong about everything you’ve said so far. It’s sad.”
“For a long time it seemed like Mrs. Bill Clinton was playing down her gender, and I think one of the reasons was because we were at war. But all of a sudden she’s playing up her ‘divine attractiveness’ and the outfits that she wears — i.e., pantsuits.”
“There aren’t a whole lot of women who think that Hillary did the honorable thing by continuing to eat all that dirt. Where was your self-respect, Mrs. Clinton? Well, she stayed with the dog in order to get to the doghouse. Her plan always was to hitch her wagon to Slick Willie and then take over.”
“Why did that call stand out to you as me being a ‘butt’? You know why it stood out? It’s because I’m not a butt. And so when I act like a butt, it stands out.”
